Lessons I've Learned Along the Way #5 (cancer/needs)

Lessons I've learned along the way #5.

"Let me know if you need anything." and "What can I do for you?" are interpreted differently.

"Let me know if you need anything." is very kind and so appreciated. I am not knocking this phrase. I have said it, and meant it many, many times, myself. But when I hear this phrase, I simply say "Thank you." (And mean it.) I don't actually tell the person what I need. It just doesn't feel comfortable, for some reason.

But "What can I do for you?" sends the message that you are ready and waiting to help. It's not just a platitude. It is a call for action. You WANT to do something. You just need to know WHAT to do.

Across the board, I have answered the "What can I do?" question with specific needs. And then almost cried because I felt truly loved by the person asking. 

There are always needs. Always. And how you phrase your words has a lot to do with whether you hear those needs or not.

Lessons I've Learned Along the Way #3 (cancer/questions)

Lessons I've learned along the way #3

Limit your questions. And weigh you questions.

Too many questions at once can be overwhelming. Don't be overwhelming.

Starting questions with "Why didn't the doctors do this...?" is also not such a great idea. Try to have great ideas.

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One of the best ways to inquire about a situation such as this is to simply ask for an update, or say "How is so-and-so doing?"

This gives the person the space to answer as they feel comfortable. And comfortably is a nice way to answer questions.